It happens in dorm rooms and school hallways all over the developed world, not to mention in bars, bedrooms, and even on the street.
Imagine the scene: Perhaps the boy is being a bit fresh, or maybe he did absolutely nothing to deserve it. Regardless of the reason, the instant a woman’s foot flies into a pair of dangling balls at speed, any other women in the immediate vicinity will react the same way. Uncontrollable bursts of mirth. The sight of a boy gone from fully composed fellow, to a stumbling, quivering mass of agony in the blink of an eye is enough to elicit a hearty chuckle from women of all walks of life, from young girls to grandmothers. And this isn’t up for debate, it’s as plain as the nose on your face, and anyone who has been on the receiving end of a testicle rocking nutshot can attest to the fact that the women present will be giggling too. Although it’s fair to say that some women might ask “Are you okay?” out of pure pity, the question will invariably be masking a tone of barely concealed amusement.
That being said, the question is, why?
I, Miss BallbustingStacy, will womansplain it to all you men who are wondering, and maybe even some women wondering why we think it’s funny, whereas if someone were to get their eye gouged out, which is perhaps similar on the pain scale, would warrant a horrific reaction. I myself have kicked multiple testicles into the stratosphere without giving it a second thought and, when I was younger I’d frankly just do it to amuse myself, so I consider myself something of an expert on the topic.
1) THE STUPID LOOK ON YOUR FACE
This is an excellent reason to kick a handsy guy straight in the balls. In one instant you can see his face go through every range of emotion from smarmy, cocksure, and haughty to suprised, shocked, in pain, upset, full of doubt and then, well, if it’s a good enough kick, full of dirt as he ends up facedown in the grass.
The questions are just as amusing. Sometimes I’ll get thrown a “Why???” As if I really need a reason! I’m just a ballbuster that’s why. Didn’t ya know? You see boy, not everyone cares as much about your balls or your ability to have children as you, so in future, if you can still get an erection, just be more careful at whom you point it at.
2) THE NOISES
Putting a boy in his proper place, ie at a woman’s feet is funny enough, but while he’s down there you also get a delightful procession of gutteral male utterances. Sometimes starting with the exclamatory, “Oh fuck…” followed by the entirely impotent “You bitch…” and moving on through the gamut of theatrical moans and groans. By the end of the first act I’m usually in tears of laughter. One of my faves is the ever popular, “My balls!” Lol, no shit ‘your balls’, I just introduced them to their old friend ‘your abdomen’. If you’re unlucky, they’ve popped through your inguinal canal and disappeared back into your belly as a pulpy goo requiring surgical intervention to save them. Got any other bright comments Captain Obvious?
3) THE INVOLUNTARY PHYSICAL REACTIONS
I already mentioned the stupid faces, which are involuntary, but then there’s a whole array of fascinating and hilarious reactions the boys go through the moment their family jewels are treated to an solid unfriendly foot blast. First of all their chin shoots up and their mouths open, eyes bulging. This is extremely satisfying by itself if the boy has been saying something like, “Hey babe, why don’t you slip me something sweet….” or something stupid like that. Then their hands shoot straight to hold their jewels, as if this is going to do any good once the damage is already done. By now any self respecting woman will drop a couple solid guffaws, and maybe a cool line like, “Have fun watching your dick die…”
Next, the boy stumbles around, with a look on his face like, “How could you??” while entreating any onlookers for assistance. Usually he will get none, as a) there’s nothing you can do once the pain train leaves the station, and b) why do anything when you can just watch and laugh at the theatrical display?
Then he sinks to his knees, which I might add, if you can trick him into moving his hands away, is a great time to treat him to another solid nutslam (for good measure). This is partly because there’s no better place for a testicle abuse sufferer than closer to mother earth, and partly because a balltastic jolt to the ol’ babymakers causes the inner ear to become imbalanced, creating waves of dizziness.
He’ll lean forward, maybe rocking back and forth in a vain attempt to quell some of the rising nausea and purest gonad agony, but to no avail. Finally he sinks to the ground, pulls up knees up to his chin and starts involuntarily crying, thanks to the cervical sympathetic ganglia causing the eyes to well up. He can even pass out. Or vomit. Or cum on impact (so I hear).
For a nice evil girl this is all music to our senses, and it’s such an over the top slapstick reaction to an easy, lightning quick nutflick, is it any wonder that it isn’t funny? The absurd is amusing, the unexpected also tickles the funnybone, and a groin punt always delivers absurdity and unexpected reactions, no matter how many times you do it.
4) THE IMMEDIATE TRANSFER OF POWER
Here we go from the oppressed and put upon, to the dominant force in an instant. There is also the amusing irony that the very essence of your maleness is also your kill button. Your takedown in our minds was inevitable, but surprises are always tres amusant. What is more surprising than when the student instantly becomes the master in this supreme example of symbolic patriarchy turned on its head? Surprise! Happy Birthday to the ground! And enjoy those bruised nuts 😉
5) BECAUSE IT’S FUN
This is my favorite reason, it’s funny because it’s fun. We laugh when we’re having fun. Have you ever gone ziplining? Jet-skiing? Landed a huge fish? It’s fun, and laughter is a natural result of that. A combination of all the reasons above adds up to a serotonin release in our female brains. This is one of the reasons that a ballbusting woman will usually have done it more than once. It can be addictive, and since society in general, usually doles out very little punishment for this hilarious type of sexual assault (mostly done loosely as a self defense move), there’s little to be lost from doing it as often as the opportunity presents itself. In fact, there’s very much a cultural imperative for women to bust balls. So often we see testicles as the butt of funny jokes in television, film, and other media, even to the point of severe groin kicks being and end in themselves in some of the more popular Youtube “prank” videos. A huge kick in the dick. That’s the joke! And it is and probably always will be funny, so those videos get views from both men and women.
And there you have it, in my opinion, five reasons why women laugh when boys get kicked in the balls.
Welcome back Stacey’s blogs. A top notch blog once again.
Thank you Stacy, I thoroughly enjoyed reading that and totally agree with every word. In all my years I have to admit that I have never come across a girl or woman that is not amused by a guy ‘brought down’ by a whack to the testicles. Even if they are destroyed, ripped off or cut off…women just laugh!
How do I meet a woman like you?!
Wow that was odd. I just wrote an really long comment
but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t appear.
Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Regardless,
just wanted to say wonderful blog!
I definitely want to get kicked in the balls by some of you
Its like you learn my thoughts! You seem to understand
a lot about this, such as you wrote the e book in it
or something. I feel that you can do with some % to
drive the message home a little bit, but other than that, this
is great blog. A great read. I’ll definitely be back.
Lol no, kicking women in the vagina would immediately land a man in supreme hot water. Every white knight in a 5 mile radius would jump on top of him and beat the shit out of him until the cops arrived. Unlike men assaulting women, no one gives a shit about women smashing men’s balls to their heart’s content. Everyone just assumes he deserves it. It’s pure entertainment!
Dear Stacy. If we made a competition: you kicking me in the sack and me returning the favour to you (well, not the sack, but – you know where) – are you really sure you would win? Would you bring me to my knees sooner than I would you? Or am I saying soemthing that should not be said to a woman like you … If I am too cruel for a fien lady like you, I sincerely appologise.
Because I really think that I could easily take the hardest of your kicks without even blinking. I would however find it really ugly to return the favour because I really don’t hate women nor their private parts as much as you obviously hate men’s.
I however wonder if you are able of a true relationship to someone and how you can separate as well as connect your act and your true nature.
Please, take no offense from my words.
Yes, pussies are stronger. You simply MUST follow along with my ballbusting challenge in this video (https://bustingstacy.com/product/naked-pussy-envy-challenge/), you do the tasks to your testicles and I do the same to my nude pussy. Let’s see if you can even reach to the end buddy 😂
I must say that I wish I had a woman like you do that for me, even though it’s painful, I would love it done to me
My girlfriend and I trade kicks several times a week. We are soooo into it.
My friend Cathy used to kick my balls a lot in high school. I started liking it, and would find ways to provoke a kick. I think her mom had a fetish for it, as she was always telling Cathy to kick guys in the balls. I could easily get her to kick me a few times a week, and when I would go to her place on the weekends, she would kick me several times a day. I always wore short thin shorts, and no underwear, so she could give me her best shots. I liked it when she would kick me in front of her mom, as she would always tell Cathy to kick me again, which she always would. It was a struggle, but when I knew the next kick was coming, I would spread my legs a bit more to give her a clear shot. I ended up on the ground many times. Some times I would pull down my shorts and act like I was checking for damage, but I was really just showing Cathy and Doris my cock and swelling balls. I had always hoped her mom would kick my balls, but she never did. I’m sure she was proud of how Cathy knew how to make a man obey.
Stacy, what do you think about ballbusting as an element of sex? For example, do you like when a guy, which you just kicked in the balls, is licking your pussy?