How do I film a ballbusting video? They’re pretty straightforward and I’m no Spielberg, but I am technically a professional, so perhaps my readers and some aspiring dickbusters out there would like to know some of the criteria I apply to get a good ballbusting video. There are a few boxes that need to be checked before I can start filming the perfect goolie smashing video. In this blog I’ll take you inside the process and tell you the best way, in my opinion, to make a good one. But before the boys read any further, remember whose blog this is, and pull your stupid testicles out (god they’re ridiculous). Scrunch them up in your hand, now gently pull them away from your body as far as they can go, go on… stretch them out… further… until you feel those poorly designed babymakers pulling the spermatic cords, yanking on god knows what deep in your abdomen…Now give them a super hard punch! Really hard! You’re a clown to me! Go on, do it.
Once you’ve done it, then you may continue reading.
1) Is there a gap in my catalogue?
It’s important to think about what videos I already have. I don’t want to get too samey, although I suppose some crossover is okay (and unavoidable within this niche fetish). I try and categorise them by doing a video on each type of ballbusting because it’s fun to mix things up and everyone wants to see a certain thing. I get many messages from people asking if I have a ballbusting video which includes this or that, and believe it or not they get very specific!
The video where I squeeze balls in a vice was because so many people were wanting to see me bust balls using a device! I stand the boy up nice and comfy after squeezing his fragile and nearly virgin testicles in a vice at maximum squish, for 20 minutes, and then kick him so bloody hard in his stupid pre-squeezed, sensitive shitnuts that he literally loses consciousness! So this video has the best of both worlds, vice and kicks (everyone loves kicks). The consciousness thing was an experiment, I was doubtful it was going to work, but amazingly it did (thank you Twitter dude).
Another video I did was inspired by silly boys who have massive ‘tough guy’ egos and no sense of reality when it comes to their very sensitive balls. You know the one, where I met a stupid douche on Tinder who very haughtily insisted that knees to the testicles don’t hurt! That’s because he’d never been kneed before, he had no frame of reference. He wasn’t even into ballbusting. Idiot. Anyway, that one was good fun too, because not only did I get to re-enact one of my favourite Liveleak videos, but after I kneed him in his douche testicles with all the irritation I could muster, he totally puked all over the floor! Completely and utterly humiliated, crying, and in total agony. Made to eat, not only his words, and his balls, but also had to chew on the meaty chunder of his last meal all the way home. It was the perfect ironic addition to his story. If I was planning my ideal testicle knee video I could hardly have made it better. I still think about that boy from time to time. I think about how he rolled up expecting a Tinder date and maybe a set of tingly bollocks, then drinks, then some top-notch Tinder fucking. He definitely shouldn’t have eaten before he showed up though (no one should, before some Stacy ballbusting…).
But I digress, my point is, that I have to cater to all different ballbusting tastes to keep my content fresh and spicy! So I have gradually added videos like the balls in a vice video, the puke video, the kicked unconscious video… but I always stop to think about what other videos I should do? Where is the gap in my ballbusting catalogue? Of course, I need to torture testicles in every conceivable way to the max!
When I’m making/releasing ballbusting videos I personally love it when the most extreme/surprising reactions happen, I love it when the boy pukes for example. That may be my favourite. There’s something a bit rapey about being forced against your will to puke up all that food you just ate. You ate it with the best intentions, you spent the money on the sandwich or whatever, dutifully chewed it up, and swallowed it, intending all that nutritious goodness spreading around your body. Then some evil lady ballkiller comes along and says, “No” and your testicles completely betray you. I don’t know what sort of evolutionary advantage pukeballs confer upon their owner. Probably none. The advantage is mine. But like I was saying, extreme reactions are so fun, I get really excited to release something that features something extreme about it. Although you can’t really plan for it, as most times the boy just ends up on the floor rolling around groaning (which is a boring but standard reaction).
Sometimes I make just completely different ballbusting-type videos just because I’ve never seen them done before, and that always drives me crazy when I can’t find something on the internet. It’s like, are you serious? This isn’t a thing yet?! Examples of this are my pool party video. It’s one of maybe two videos on the whole internet (and good luck finding the other one) where a stupid boy gets dragged around a pool with a rope tied directly to his nutsac, stretching the wet ball skin out so far it’s gone and given him permanent saggy bollocks. Now they dip in the toilet when he shits, and whenever that happens he thinks of his lovely lady, BallbustingStacy. Needless to say, when he gets fully pulled out of the pool by his big swollen jewels he then gets kicked inside out by yours truly, and every girl watching at the pool party has a good laugh as he’s moaning on the floor. So like I said, it’s very unique and the outdoors change of scene is nice.
The other example of a ballbusting video which hasn’t been done before is my newly released Velma ballbusting video. Sure, there’s lots of Velma porn out there (she’s a cosplay fetish, don’t you know!) but there was not a single Velma ballbusting video that I could find online, so that gap in the market inspired me! And it turned out really really well! I also included a mix of ballbusting styles in that one to keep everyone aroused 😉
It’s vital that every video has at least something that makes it stand out. One day I might eat my words here, but otherwise, it just seems lazy. Fill the gaps in your catalogue ladies.
2) You need to find just the right ballboi
Unfortunately, you can’t just pick any old ballboi off the street. I get a lot of ballbusting enthusiasts desperately wanting to get their nuts caved in and even do it on video. And that’s fine, I respect that. I’ll give you the time of day because we’re both super into sexy ball-destroying. Even as you lie there rolling around in your own ball puke, chewing on your testes I sent sailing through your innards. It’s hilarious, but also hot. Not in an I-Want-To-Bone-You-Now kinda way. More in a damn look at this fucking idiot shitting himself in pain, I’m super powerful, I need to get fucked hard by a real man immediately kinda way. And to each their own. But as I was saying, not every boy is right to be in a ballbusting video. It takes the right kind of boy.
Anyone can get busted or be into ballbusting, but I like my ballbois to look a certain way: not too fat; not too skinny; not too old; not too tall; and well, over-18, of course. I think that’s fair. I’ll bust almost anyone IRL but in videos, he needs to look like he gives a damn about his appearance. And ideally, have big dangly balls (my fave).
Dangly, full, large balls looks the best when it comes to slow motion and even just at regular speed, big dangly balls are the best because it allows your foot more time to slam into them and bring them up to speed. Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but if my University physics memory serves, the dangly balls connecting and glomming onto my speeding foot is what’s known as an “inelastic collision” where the kinetic energy of my foot is preserved and joined with the energy of his sensitive and fragile testicles, accelerating them to full speed until the whole thing thuds to a crushing halt in the unforgiving crotch of his heavy body. All the kinetic energy from my whole leg plus the redistributed weight of my body is transferred entirely to his nice, soft, balls which in many ways act like tiny water balloons. The fibrous testicle covering strains nearly to bursting, and may just pop if I’m lucky. Which would be the worst possible agony a man can experience, but for me is very amusing because I don’t give a single fuck if your balls are destroyed. Plus! It makes the other twisted ballbois very horny and would make a cool AF video. LOL
So, big juicy dangly balls it is. Also big dicks look better on camera (obviously), but I like to hide the dicks whenever possible. I don’t care about that shit, I just like to smash balls. Deal with it!
Also, and here’s the best idea, try your hardest to get the freshest, most inexperienced ballboy you can find to take it in the nuts for your enjoyment. For a video, you want someone who, ideally, has absolutely no idea what they’re getting themselves into. In fact, the best is if they’ve never been kicked in the balls at all ever before. You get the most wonderful candid reactions.
Lemme do a bit of womansplaining to you nutboys. When you’re kicked in the shit, neurotransmitters called “Substance P” that alert the brain that it’s feeling pain are then released from within the testicles. Substance P travels from the testicles up through the spinal column into the brain and is then processed by the part of the brain called the somatosensory cortex, which is responsible for processing physical sensations. It’s this Substance P which causes all the wonderful reactions in your woefully programmed body. All the things women laugh at. Dizziness, abdominal cramps, pain, loss of bowel or bladder control, nausea, vomiting, etc etc, LMFAO etc.
But, when a stupid slave has been kicked in the nutbag for years and years, the testicles release less and less substance P, and eventually over time you have to fucking beat their idiotbeans with a goddamn sledgehammer to get any sort of reaction from them. It’s a bit annoying and disappointing, and especially doesn’t look good for an impressive video. So what do you do? Kick noobs. No one wants to see a wrinkly old man take full force kick after full force kick. Who among your ball-flock can bloody identify with that? No! They want to see a fearful, but resolute idiot taking a mammoth groin assault and end up clutching his whole body, rocking back and forth in a foetal position, sucking his thumb and wishing he’d never been born, or possibly just wishing that sweet death would end his suffering. I mean, let’s be honest, everyone wants to see that.
Also, dudes who flinch or jump when you kick them can fuck right off. I didn’t cart you all the way out here for you to dodge my goddamn boot you pathetic, worthless pussy! Phew! No flinchers allowed on video! You just stand there and take it like a man, which reminds me… Punch your dick and balls!
3) Bust testes in the correct order
So you can’t just go ahead and kick the absolute everloving fuck out of balls just off the bat. Yeah, it’ll be the most painful thing he’s ever experienced in his life, of course. But here’s the thing, it could be even more painful if you just do it right! We wouldn’t want him to miss out now, would we? Whether it’s just some creep in a bar, or a tied up slave, it’s really important you give him a fun, full lesson in ball-physics. As every teacher knows a proper lesson should be planned out. Let’s take those first two examples just for starters.
A) The creep in a bar
Just because it’s an impromptu lesson doesn’t mean you can’t be thoughtful about it. Add some lovely heat to that first kick by simply adding a second full force nutblasting kick. It’s so rare that a douchey lad expects a second kick in his beloved junk immediately after the first. Take advantage of that! You know that look on a not-too-clever lad’s face after he’s squeezed a lady’s bum and found a knee buried so deep in his balls that some he experiences an earthquake? You know the look, it’s frightened, shocked, and full of hurt and indignation, as if just his face is saying, “My sperm colony, how could you do this to my future babies?” Yeah, that look. Let me tell you from personal experience, immediately follow your knee with a step back and then a lightning-fast kick in his dick so immensely hard that his juicy berries splat on either side of your foot. You’ll see that look changes from cold surprise, to what I can only call supreme ball agony face. Looks like a Greek tragedy mask!
Then he’ll spend the rest of his “lesson” face-down in the sticky, stale-beer-smelling floor, and no nice ladies will have to look at his stupid mug again all night.
B) The tied up slave
This is where lesson planning really comes into play. So let’s say you want to send his bollocks straight to hell. Well, obviously you could just kick them nonstop until you get tired and he’s a bloody mess. I mean, you can still do that, but why not squeeze them in a mechanical vice first! Better yet, speedball punch them for 4 minutes first, to soften them up for the vice. I’ve mentioned this in a previous blog, but with speedbag punching, you can slam those stupid fuckers nearly 1000 times in 4 minutes. After that, they’re extremely sensitive to the touch. Most men crumple after just one hit, and slaves are “just men” too. Except that they’re tied up so there’s no crumpling allowed. Imagine, all the fun of those two punches you took on yourself at the beginning of this blog, multiplied by 1000! Now that you don’t want any more ball abuse, it’s time to put them in the testicle vice and go do something fun while you squirm and pray that your precious orbs do not die. It’ll be funny if they do though haha, let’s be honest. So then finally, when they’re bruised and battered and crushed nearly to nothing, and the sensitive pink ball-goo inside your ovate spheroids is all mangled and confused, I’ll finally release them from their horrible prison. The blood rushes back into them and they’re on fire. Your sex is on fire. You’re screaming into your gag. And NOW it’s finally time to kick them nonstop until I get tired.
Do you see how it works? You gotta bust them in the correct order! Ballbois must be crazy to give me their balls. I suppose they need a bit of nerve to be able to stay conscious and not go all pukey. Either that or they have to be super thirsty perverts who don’t know when to quit!